When I was at one of my lowest (mental) points in life, I couldn’t get out of bed some days. I had no energy or motivation and was barely getting by.
I had therapy once per week, and on this particular week I didn’t have much to ‘bring’ to the session. He asked how my week was and I really had nothing to say.
“What are you struggling with?” he asked.
I gestured around me and said “I dunno man. Life.”
Not satisfied with my answer, he said “No, what exactly are you worried about right now? What feels overwhelming? When you go home after this session, what issue will be staring at you?”
I knew the answer, but it was so ridiculous that I didn’t want to say it.
I wanted to have something more substantial.
Something more profound.
But I didn’t.
So I told him, “Honestly? The dishes. It’s stupid, I know, but the more I look at them the more I CAN’T do them because I’ll have to scrub them before I put them in the dishwasher, because the dishwasher sucks, and I just can’t stand and scrub the dishes.”
I felt like an idiot even saying it.
What kind of grown ass woman is undone by a stack of dishes? There are people out there with *actual* problems, and I’m whining to my therapist about dishes?
But my therapist nodded in understanding and then said:
“RUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE.”
I began to tell him that you’re not supposed to, but he stopped me.
“Why the hell aren’t you supposed to? If you don’t want to scrub the dishes and your dishwasher sucks, run it twice. Run it three times, who cares?! Rules do not exist, so stop giving yourself rules.”
It blew my mind in a way that I don’t think I can properly express.
That day, I went home and tossed my smelly dishes haphazardly into the dishwasher and ran it three times.
I felt like I had conquered a dragon.
The next day, I took a shower lying down.
A few days later. I folded my laundry and put them wherever the fuck they fit.
There were no longer arbitrary rules I had to follow, and it gave me the freedom to make accomplishments again.
Now that I’m in a healthier place, I rinse off my dishes and put them in the dishwasher properly. I shower standing up. I sort my laundry.
But at a time when living was a struggle instead of a blessing, I learned an incredibly important lesson:
I want to write. I have ideas. I open document. I type four of the worst sentences ever created in the english language. I daydream the rest of the scene. I close document.
Know what fuck it explaining as soon as I get off mobile this is important and I’m pissed and I need you people to hear it
so i’m trans
and i have been spoon feed this shit for years
There are more, but you get the idea.
If you’ve been on this website, or any website really, you’ll know just how much of everywhere this is. You can not escape it. Men are Trash and Pigs and all that good stuff.
Recently, I found “Where’d you go?” a comic by Jason Porath, the man behind the Rejected Princesses book about a nightmare he’s been having since 2016 that seems, at least a little, connected to the “All men are trash” thing. Reading this kind of made me realize something about myself; all these All men are trash posts have given me internalized transphobia. I Actively hate myself for not being cis. For giving up womanhood to join the side of evil. And it’s not like i hate any other trans people, yall are great, it’s just me, and it’s my first time really realizing what internalized transphobia feels like or means.
What makes it worse is this is something TERFs what. For those (lucky) few who have avoided TERFs, they are Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminists. They hate Trans Men for betraying woman by becoming part of the problem and they hate Trans Woman for being Men “pretending” to be woman to hurt them. They’re the kind of people making all the “If we let trans woman use the right bathroom they’ll assault cis woman!!!” stuff. Trashy people who think trashy things that only hurt people.
But they made me have their ideology.
So, how many people in the above screenshots are TERFs or Radfem? 3. And those are only the ones who say it on their blogs. 3 out of 5 of the screenshots are from TREFs or Redfem and these are just the first few post i saw when I searched up “All Men are Trash.”
This shit is everywhere
I feel awful
I hate myself
They won
I hope you all are happy
a bonus:
note is in response to this
Listen. Please share this. There are already trans guys in the notes saying this is important. Listen to us.
Hate to make a long post longer but here are some important takes from the notes
Alrite, im not normal. I hav a very low attention span and enjoy just being weird. If you befriend me, then you'll see, im a practical joke waiting to happen. Im a pacifist so no people are harmed in the making of my jokes. Shoot me a question and ill answer them all :D
![ultrafacts:
“Source: [x]
Click HERE for more facts!”](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e54d78e49c0277aa4b6e15fbe74ff373/82afc7f328f945ad-13/s500x750/400f4c5ac2edad0caa0eca54e3e2573eaafe8347.png)
